It’s almost the beginning of the fall semester, and even though I can now count myself among the graduates, I find myself already receiving requests for panel presentations at various universities around Los Angeles. I’ve been organizing these panels for a few years now and each one is always so exhilarating and wonderful.
Usually, we have about 6 people on the panel, give or take a few depending on everyone’s availability. The group consists of folks in the BDSM community who are educated, talented, eloquent and just plain fun. As a group, we’ve been doing these for many years and we all know one another fairly well. Still, it never fails that we each learn something new about one another during the presentations. Since we get along so well, we play off one another and the discussion flows superbly.
We’ve had some amazing questions as well. I’ve listed some of my favorites at the end of this. The students are also very open with us and ask out of honest interest and curiosity. Once in awhile we get someone who is certain we’re all psychotic weirdos and that we couldn’t possibly be real, genuinely nice people. Most of the time, when that type of person gets noticed, we just stop answering those questions. One time, however, one of our panel members had enough, and more or less told the guy off, to the cheers of the other students who felt he had overstepped the bounds of rudeness. Most of the time, though, we’re a rather calm bunch.
I had a fabulous time last semester when I introduced my primary and secondary partners to the class. I had been the teaching assistant all semester, had told the students that I practiced polyamory and that they would get to meet my partners. However, I found out when we were all standing there in front of the class that many of the students thought I had been lying! Imagine their surprise to see me kiss one partner good-bye in front of the other, and for them then to embrace! The students were definitely impressed that I actually lived the lifestyle I spoke about.
I look forward to answering more questions and providing real information about how I live my life.
Some favorite questions:
What is your safeword when you practice SM? Where would you draw the line?
Can someone switch roles once they have established a Dom(me)/sub relationship?
Do you have strong religious beliefs and do your sexual behaviors conflict with them?
Do you feel judgmental against those who do not practice SM or atypical sexual behaviors?
How would you feel about your children doing some of the same things you do?
Does it ever bother you that your partner has sex or love relationships with other people?
In SM, what activity would you recommend to beginners who are interested in trying some of them?
How much pain is considered BDSM?
How many partners can one have?
How do you keep “planned” sex from feeling forced or not spontaneous?